The Cancer Trap

I haven't written in a very long time and was recently prompted to write my story, since I have a very important one. I have many requests for help and suggest to friends that have friends or colleagues considering alternative healing to discuss these topics before surging headlong into traditional western medicine tactics to deal with their cancer diagnosis.

To start, I would like to say emphatically, that without truly examining your lifestyle and diet, you will never make the changes necessary for a longer and happier life.  For me, this was the biggest reason I contracted this dis-ease. I had to primarily receive this idea on every level before I could go forth into my healing. This is not to say you will never have cheat days, oh you will! They are actually necessary for challenging your immune system to stay strong so you can get through this thing called life.

So, to start at somewhere of a beginning, I will start with my realization of what I deem great wrongs in the world.  For one, if you don't already know about the terrible state of additives in food, then I have to write a separate blog on that for you.  It will be par for the course as this is very important if you want to stay well and thrive into old age. I will continue as if you know this as many already do. To summarize, natural flavors means small doses of human body parts, namely aborted fetus. You do not want this in you as it is satanic and is part of the cabal program to enslave you and control you. I am not kidding.

To realize the food industries agenda is a huge part of getting well and staying well. Cancer has been created as an outdoor for those not wanting to be courageous and dive into old age. Old age is not for sissies. Everyday is a battle. Especially now. These days are the hardest, as we are facing challenges we have never had to face in this generation.  

My journey began when I had an awful experience in my 20's finding a snuff photograph in a house (a barn actually where my friends lived and practiced for their band) I was visiting. My initial reaction was that of shock, and then disgust. I am an empath and immediately felt the pain of the image which was a woman with her arms tied above her head suspended in black leather S&M style. being stabbed with a spike in her breast. I felt it right away when I saw it and honestly couldn't believe my eyes. It was framed in a shiny red frame and being a picture framer, I saw this as a satanic sin on many levels. Although I was not well versed yet on these topics, I knew in my soul it was wrong, very very wrong.

I knew it was someones property, but I could not withhold my rage over its existence and threw it out the window of the second story as if a snake had bitten me. It felt like it had as my left breast felt the spike in it as she had. This was when my wound began. That day was a terrible day as some Nazi punks showed up at the Barn right after I destroyed it, but I will get to that presently.

I went downstairs and broke the frame and burned it all. The frame stayed because all had was a lighter and wood takes longer to catch fire. The photograph and paper backing went up in flames instantly. The frame was left in a star formation and I just left it there.

This is the trippy part. I know I left the star formation there on purpose decreed by God who is woth me always because I Believe. The Nazi Punks were chased off by the leader of the band because they attacked a sculpture I made and had there of an agapanthas flower stalk and some driftwood that I had on the kitchen counter. (I ha brought it to show him and he said to leave it there.) They had taken a hedge clipper and half cut the stem off made of bronze. This was the second star symbolism.

When the Nazi punks took off, they skidded out the dirt lot in their trucks and dust flew up into the air. With the light of the sun, and the dust, a tree there made the third star formation. Three stars: the phots frame, my sculpture and the tree. It was clear the trinity was at work and in my eyes this was God working in my favor.

I had destroyed the evil, but was soon after banned from the property for destroying property. It was worth it. Turns out it was an Antoine le Vay satanic snuff photograph and it was collectible to the person whose room I found it in. We had always had access to the place as friends but I never thought I'd ever see something like that. This person as of questionable character and I had done a healing on him as he was very sick one night. I saw green cubes floating over him when I was working on his chakras and he was drifting in and out of consciousness. I didn't know then but now I think he was a heroin addict or speed or something. There were many drugs around the band at that time. Everybody smoked and drink was prevalent as well.

So, this was the beginning of my breast injury. It was emotionally rooted/based or however you want to state it. It was taken on by the pain of the moment and the evil that entered my physical realm.

The following years were different and difficult and I learned many things including much more on the topic of dark satanic practices. I was supposed to learn about these things so that in the future, where we are now, I could utilize this attained knowledge to further my work, and I have. I have a keen eye and have detected layers of BS related to the Satanic Agenda as I call it, practiced by the Cabal and their kin. We all know now of how Hollywood is insidious in their support of Satanism and symbols pervade their streams of narrative. We have all been inundated with the flow of pushed agenda and some of us have succumbed whilst others have grown a thicker skin to it and stayed strong enough to warn others and stay the course in Gods will.

 

I went through much hardship as I was a survivor of much since that fateful day.  I had survived an abortion in my 20's and a miscarriage in my 30's. All were lessons for me. I had to go through what I did to know now what I do today. It wasn't an easy life, but it was mine and I'll be damned if I go down without stating these important facts here today.

The things that caused my tumor or blocked duct to grow, were a lack of understanding as to what it was I witnessed and how the evil satanic cabal work against us in our daily lives. One could say I was a creature of habit because I was, but it was more than that. I was, along with my brethren on earth, victim to a mass attempt at genocide of a generation.

I learned later that the Cabal had in fact poisoned generations before mine with cancer laced vaccines, intended for killing Castro, but that they let it go into the public consumption knowing full well that the SV40 (SemperVirens 40 - a monkey gene) was tainted with Cancer cells. This story can be read in three books written by Judyth Baker called Marys Monkey, Me & Lee and another by or of David Ferrie .These books outlined the experiments put forth during JFKs presidency and what happened prior to the Bay of Pigs. It also deals with the cancer vaccine intended for Castro and how it got let out to the public - endangering the lives of the boomers and their kin for decades to come. The polio vaccine was tainted with it and the Pope and all the Cabal knew full well what they did. The Royal House of Windsor knew too. It was part of their genocide program.  A woman was burned to death for attempting to expose this truth and the books deal with that too. Anyway, you can read about it yourself, I am not lying.

Whether my tumor/lump had been pre-programmed to enact itself when I saw that evil photo or the other way around, I don't know. All I know is that I definitely felt something pop and become manifested then and it was tied into a soul scar that later I would also weave into my life story which connected to a past life I had having to do with being the daughter of a king and being closely tied to magical creatures not unlike the story of the heroine in Game of Thrones.  

This realization came about in a 'healing' session with a young woman by the name of Jacqueline Rene Pace (now Kinkaid) whom I trusted to delve into my souls past and help me to heal my scar wounds. I later found out that somehow my past life story was so similar to this Epic that I wondered if she sold my story to them somehow psychically. Today I am convinced she did.  I never watched that TV show, but from what I gather, it is exactly like the story I told her in my past life regression. (Upon further reflection, I realize now that it was in fact a trigger moment that re-enacted a soul memory of a scar I had in a previous life as this friend of dragons and magical seer healer. My roles in my life never changed, as we carry with us all of our past stories into each new life. Incarnation never ends, as we are here to evolve and learn through each new incarnation. We learn this as we go and I have.)

She was with a guy that was the brother of a good friend of mine, Matthew Roddy. They are apart now I hear and Matthew died one night of an apparent suicide. He helped me with my miscarriage and was a very good soul who was tortured by bad spirits and fought gallantly. His story is another story and one of many of my friends whose apparent suicide is still questionable to me to this day. I do not believe he nor Kalvin Fromm of Stockton committed suicide. Things seem appropriated in the spirit world. I saw them shapeshift at a gathering and I will never forget it. Demons.

These people are part of the Cabal, posing as lightworkers and are still to this day shining their illuminati light towards others in the guise of Love and Light. Many here in the SF Bay Area are caught up in this brainwash and I know about it because I was. It's very hard to see through the BS unless you've been on both sides of it. They work very quietly and secretly and they are DS. (Deep State)

The psychological control of this area is sick. 

So, back to my Cancer. I was going to move to Florida with my husband and daughter  and went in for a quick checkup at planned parenthood where I used to go for my womens stuff because I am and have been low income forever. I was alerted to the lump by a very nice doctor woman and she said that I should go get a biopsy on it because it was quite large.  

I made an appointment at the General Hospital Chope County General on Hillsdale Blvd and had a very uncomfortable mammogram (my first ouch) and then a sinister biopsy in a cold back room in the dark with a creepy doctor (and large Jewish nurse to make me comfy) who complimented me on my large breasts. He said that he's so used to small Chinese breasts and that mine were a real pleasure to work with because it was so easy to get a nice piece.

Looking back at this I am sure my 'piece' was used for some cloning.  I saw him studying his "samples" in a dark room with numerous screens angled at his chair afterwards. It was very quiet back there.

I then had to come back to be examined by a surgeon who upon meeting had not even seen my mammograms or biopsy results but was very ready to tell me I had to have a double mastectomy and all of the chemotherapy I could along with radiation. I saw a woman with a tube hanging out of her chest on the side in the waiting room, looking half dead and decided right then, this isn't what I wanted before I even went in there.  This surgeon told me that my tumor would increase double in a month where it hadn't changed in 15 years.

I was feeling very untrusting of him since he didn't see my mammograms and was already giving me instructions. I asked about them and he said "Oh yes, I'd better get those from the nurse."

He went away and  came back with them and reiterated his claim. We left saying we would like to think about it. (My mother was with me) While we waited for my discharge papers, another doctor appeared at the nurses counter and said "Next customer please!". We were shocked.

I returned a few weeks later with my father who flew in to see me, and visited with the oncologist who was a very nice Indian woman who told me of their procedures and protocols and said that with a little chart I would have five years of life with their pills and chemicals.

I decided to go my own way after being scared to death by their offering. I went to our holistic practitioners and trusted them more than these barbaric means to  end. 

My journey to this day has been one of my own making. I read books, talked to shamans and in fact became one to further my understanding of my predicament. It was a journey of life and learning I had embarked on - the story of my life.

End of Chapter One.

To completely comprehend the big picture that I am attempting to paint, will take some jumping around. And, I will revisit certain areas to clarify that which I touch upon in the beginning.  Apparently, my life moves in circles and spirals, and unless you start to realize that life IS like this, you will never grasp the ideas I will be trying to convey. Yes, there will be an aspect of time travel expressed. Yes, there will be crazy connections and links that the unexamined viewpoint would miss, but I will do my best to explain them to you. Your mind might stretch and I will name names, but that is because this is the truth and it has set me free, so far.

I came to this chapter with some idea of how to begin, but of course due to distraction it has begun differently. The place I wanted to start was where I was directed to the first hospital as a fear based move and then as the days went on, my feelings changed. What I noticed after I conveyed the data of my diagnosis to my family and friends, was how they each reacted and how they began to deal with the news. I noticed how everyone who I told, reacted as if it was about them. This was very curious to me. It became obvious that I was a cog in the wheel of their life and although I knew they loved me, it was so clear to me that they were affected by my news not in the way I expected, but more so in the way they would be affected by it. 

It's hard to explain this without sounding slightly callous, but it was different for all involved. What I saw was how each persons personality was exemplified by the news of me having cancer. They started to reflect upon their own lives and they started to imagine what their lives would be like if I were to die. I started to feel like I had already died in their eyes because they started to look at me like I may die.

This was a very difficult thing to experience on top of the actual news because as you can and may imagine if this has happened to you, its like doubling down on the stress.  I will now explain something you may not have thought of though. I did not feel like this. I felt more alive than ever. I felt challenged.

My husband at the time of the news reacted in pure fear, but that is how he ran anyway. He is an Aquarius and he went out and bought books. Books on Cancer. He came back and lay them on me. When we met, he lay books on me too. Many many books. He loves books and Aquariuses are very into ideas. He is a traumatized man and didn't know how to express his fear and pain so this is what he did. he also took off because he is an aloof person. He would spend time sitting in his truck in the driveway, rather than come inside to be with us. Already the rift was happening in our relationship, because he was traumatized from hsi previous life before me.  We hadnt been married long and the sudden shock of the news sent him for extra spins. He was already very stressed and we were pretty different at the time on different extremes of the political spectrum. Today, we would probably be much more alike as I woke up to many things I didn't know back then. 

He was in the military as an MP for 6 years in Germany prior to my knowing him. We were friends of Bill and met there. He is a hilarious man when he gets going. He can rock a crowd into raoring laughter when he's relaxed. He is traumatized though and out of respect I will not go into detail other to say than he has had a very rocky life with many challenges. Upon reflection, I;ve grown to have compassion for him and forgive him his reactions. He did love me and our daughter, but he became incapable of coping with us as well as his challenges.

His way of dealing with this was to overstate everything and make a bigger scene than what was necessary, but maybe this was his way of showing he cared. He was emphatic and a Giant of a man. I miss him, but I know he is living a happier life now. So, I am jumping ahead here, but the time has become long and I forget exactly how things went perfectly.

I remember being called on July 29th, 2009 by the Dr. at Planned Parenthood. County hospital had called her as the initial doctor to inform of my biopsy results. She called me and told me over the phone that I was formally diagnosed with Carcinoma In Situ, Breast Cancer. I called my husband and he didnt answer his phone. I didnt leave a message other than to please call me. I didnt want tosay it over a message.  I called my mom next, quite upset that I couldnt reach Kevin. My mom said to come right over, so I, upset as I was, got our stuff together and our three year old daughter Thea and drove over to my moms in San Mateo from our aprtment in Redwood City.

We had been packing to leave to move to Florida because my father had offered him a job and they had even bought us a house out there. I was nervous about this huge move and being away from my mom, but I was ready to go and although things weren't perfect, was attempting to be okay with everything. Looking back now, I see a lot clearer than I did at the time. I did not want to be doctored but what ensued frm then on was going to be a huge awakening on my part. Its just, it didnt actually come all at once, it happened in layers.

End of Chapter Two.

The next bits are going to seem crazy, but they are all true.  The visits to the first hospital ensued as I explained in CH 1, so I am going to jump to my 'Second opinion' bit. I had had an MRI done (another story unto itself which possibly I will explain after this due to its strange nature and my extreme sensitivities) and this MRI along with my mamograms and original paperwork accompanied me to Stanford, my second opinion hospital.

Npw, idk if youve ever been to Stanford Hospital, but it is GRAND. Like a huge hotel. A very very Grand Hotel. The amount of money pumped intoStanford is Phenomenal. The place is like a palace. There is a pianist playing on a grand piano as you walk in and the hallways and desks, chairs and waiting room seem so opulent it is unexplainable.  

I was handed a binder of what was going to be my protocol plan complete with all the papers to read and keep track of my adventure there.  This was what was explained to me as a "Teaching Hospital'.

Stanford has students and they follow the doctors around learning from real time patients who come there. My husband Kevin accompanied me and we were led to a room where a young female Asian intern prepared me for what was going to happen to me with speaking to all of the different doctors. She said the different doctors would be coming in to talk to me separately and I must just take off my top and put on a covering paper gown.

The first doctor was the general practitioner and leader of the wing and he was accompanied by at least 15 interns who all crowded into the rather small room with him. I was to sit on the examining table as the example. He asked me to take off my gown and he began to teach the class using me as the subject matter.  It was very strange! He showed them my anatomy and lifted my breast to show them the harder part underneath. I forget what it was called but it was very weird being treated like a piece of meat there before 15 strangers. He didnt really even ask me about my lump or even touch the part that was the tumor, but instead focused on the class. I did notice one of the male students beginning to get aroused while he was showing them my breasts, and it was very embarrassing. He didn't seem to notice, but maybe they are used to this?  It was quite informal and I joked to blow off my nervousness that its okay, I am a nudist. I had been to one hot spring once in my 20's where people went naked and it was also strange, and I did feel uncomfortable when a lesbian was eyeing me but I didn't say all of that there. I didnt ever go to one of those places again and I realize now that the reason I felt so uncomfortable there at these places and here at the hospital in front of these strangers was because I actually am an old fashioned girl and do like my privacy!

They shuffled out and we were alone again waiting for the surgeon.  She arrived with one student with her and I liked her. I saw she was Jewish and because I am Jewish too, I felt a bond with her. She seemed the most trustworthy so far and as she was talking I wanted to trust her wholeheartedly, but something was also pushing me back. I couldn't explain it but the feeling was like a friend you want to have but they push back? Its hard to explain, but I thin looking back now, I see it was God or the Angels helping me separate from something that I was maybe projecting on her.  I have realized that not all Jews are the same. And American Jews are not South African Jews. She was very confident and now I see that the confidence I was witnessing was money.

She didnt stay long and the last person to come in to see me was the Oncologist. Before I explain her, I will say she was the last one to see me in private meeting and then we were to wait outside in the opulent courtyard with a giant fountain for 45mins while all of the Doctors conferred over my case and all of my papers and MRI.

The Oncologist has pinwheel eyes and they spun when she talked to me. I had never seen eyes like this. She was blond and cute like a robot model and she was absolutely removed emotionally from me as a person other than to convince me that the drugs and poison she was going to induce me with would be wonderful and cure me right up. It scared the living daylights out of me. Upon reflection, and this was in 2009 mind you and its now 2021, and I remember it like it was yesterday, I see that she had these LSD pinwheel eyes of a very well seasoned drug dealer.

I left with Kevin after she scared me the most and we got some sandwiches and a drink and waited by the stepped fountain outside.  

While waiting outside, we witnessed trains of 8-10 people in suits trailing after doctors in white coats marching in and out of the interleading doors to the hospital.  Some were marching in with doctors, while others were marching in a out in groups without doctors. I couldn't for the life of me figure out who they were, but it was very obvious there were a lot of them.  Then it dawned on me! They are the Pharma drug reps! They are the sellers of the drugs.

This was the heyday of the war in Afghanistan and from what I have learned so far, the good old USA was guarding Opium fields there under Obamas reign of terror. I voted for him twice yes. We didnt know anything. My husband did, but I was daft back then. He listened to Savage Nation and Rush Limbaugh, but I was a dumb democrat and didn't know what I know now.

So why I am saying this is that this president we all loved and believed was selling us down the river as idiots and funding all of this killing of the real American dream while lining his pockets amongst other things as we later found out. Perspective is everything.  To learn that these bad actors used everyone like this is absolutely criminal. I am witness to so much it is unbloody believable.

End of Chapter Three.

We went back in to the  room and was met with the intern, whom informed us that the verdict after they studied my papers, mammograms and MRI was that I will need the full protocol of everything  - surgery and radiation and chemotherapy, just as the doctors at Chope said and I asked her what the surgeon said specifically after seeing my MRI and she then said... The surgeon (whom I trusted the most remember?) got a call and had to step out of the room when they looked at the MRI and she didn't see it.

So, the surgeon, who I trusted the most, made a decision based on NEVER seeing my MRI and would proceed upon that to deem me eligible for full surgery. 

My trust in that Grand Hotel was shattered and we walked out of there with my big shiny new fancy binder and all of my papers, MRI and x-ray mammograms and never went back to either hospital ever again. 

My healing had begun. I knew what I DID NOT WANT TO DO VERY CLEARLY! I would not be feeding their monster, that's for sure!!!

My life completely changed from that point on. I decided to stay near my mom and focus on healing my body and not move us to Florida. We gave up the house and the job, and although it was very upsetting for my husband who had a bad back anyway, it was the best thing for our small family at the time and I felt better about being closer to my mother at this fragile time.

It was sad that I had to make this decision on such harsh terms but it felt right to let go of that change and stay. I has written on the boxes that were to be moved FLORIDA OR BUST. It was very ironic, it my bust that was at stake.

The next few months were turbulent to say the least. I was reading books I found an was given and researching alternative means to heal myself. I had a large connective group of healers through my mother and I began to focus on what I could do to heal myself from this diagnosis.

One thing I realized very clearly, I was at a huge turning point in my life and it was time to reassess everything.  I had a lot of things to consider and I was fully aware of how my life affected others. It felt like A Wonderful Life and I had to come back to life from a diagnosis of death.  It was a journey I was embarking upon and you will hear  me say that many times as you read on because it was in fact the beginning of a very important journey that I am still walking through today.

My first and foremost book that resonated with me, that I focused the most on was a book by Brandon Bays, who was a student of Tony Robbins and she wrote a book called The Journey, about her journey of curing herself from cancer, a basketball sized cancer in her ovary that she shrunk to a baseball. She went inner to rid herself of her deep demons and I found this the most helpful at the beginning of my adventure into myself.

End of Chapter Four.

 I just found a book about this I started in 2012 and also an email was given to me by my mother showing me the names of the doctors at Stanford and more detailed information which is quite reflective for me now. Writing this story isn't easy in the least. The level of concern from my family hasn't been fully integrated by me and it has been a journey on so many levels it is hard to translate it because of my lack of understanding of everyone else's perspectives. One thing is clear however, and that is that as time goes on and we get to look back at what 'happened', I had to make choices for myself and my little family, that I knew full well would affect the greater outcome of all.  I realize now that I did in fact choose very well, beacuse I have made it this far to 2021. 2012 to 2021 is a great fet of accomplishment if you consoder the fact that the western traditional medicine treatments ensure 5 years from date of their beginning of 'treatment', their way.

I am so glad I chose to follow my heart and vision for a chemical free future vs. their chemical way. The fact that 4 years later I was to be given the article that solidified my decision stating that my 'kind' of cancer wasn't cancer at all and that 'doctors' renegged the diagnosis - yes after countless numbers of women has undergone their 'treatment$' and full mastectomy SURGERIES - and deemed it such a low rate fo death at 2% that it was no longer termed carcinoma.